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Tips to consider when divorcing a narcissist

On Behalf of | Apr 11, 2024 | Family Law

Divorcing a narcissist is a challenging undertaking because they’re so self-absorbed that they can’t negotiate productively. They often misinterpret situations and try to twist things in their favor so they can have their way.

There are several things to consider when you’re divorcing a narcissist. Remembering these tips may help you if you’re in this position.

Document everything related to the divorce

Narcissists may try to change facts to suit their narrative. Keep a detailed record of all interactions, including emails, texts and notes from in-person conversations. This documentation can be invaluable in legal proceedings by helping establish behavior patterns and contradict false statements.

Limit direct communication with your ex

Communicating directly with a narcissistic spouse can be emotionally draining and counterproductive. Limit direct interactions when possible. When direct communication is unavoidable, keep it brief, factual and unemotional to avoid manipulation and conflict.

Set firm boundaries and enforce them

Narcissists thrive on violating boundaries, so it’s essential to establish and maintain clear limits during the divorce process. Be specific about your non-negotiable points, such as custody arrangements or financial settlements, and don’t engage in arguments.

Stay focused on your goals for the future

It’s easy to get caught up in the emotional whirlwind of divorcing a narcissist. Keep your focus on the end goal, which is dissolving the marriage as smoothly and swiftly as possible. Avoid getting dragged into petty disputes that distract from the main objectives.

Seek support from loved ones and professionals

Divorcing a narcissist can be isolating and emotionally taxing. Lean on friends, family and support groups who understand what you’re going through. Professional counseling can also provide strategies to cope with emotional stress and maintain your mental health.

Protect your privacy as much as possible

Narcissists may attempt to pry into your personal life to gain leverage in divorce proceedings. Protect your privacy by securing your social media accounts, changing passwords and safeguarding personal information. Doing this may help to avoid personal attacks by your ex.

Working with an attorney who’s familiar with handling high-conflict divorces and familiar with narcissistic behaviors can be beneficial. They can strategize effectively to anticipate and counteract manipulative tactics. In doing so, they can more effectively protect your rights and interests.